FINALLY we return!!
Sorry about the delay folks.
The foul mouth maidens of the podcasting world return once again with guest host Karine Charlebois to discuss our favorite old timey blood suckers!
This round we will be talking about two great unconventional vampire movies. The first is 1996's Karmina, from Quebec...Which I couldn't find a trailer of ANYWHERE so here's a photo of one of the characters.
We will also be chatting about 2011's independent film, Midnight Son. Which I DID find a trailer for!
We here at The Kitch have taken a slight detour from our regular format to bring you a round table discussion on one of our favorite horror tropes, The Vampire!
Joining us is, Colleen from Wyng'd Lyon Creations, Bevin from Fan Fatales, and our dear friend Tyana who loves all things vampire, to discuss various bloodsucking fiends. As always we have horror crush, the Weekly Fuck Off, a Metal Mikey-gram, and yes...Twilight WILL be discussed. So suck it up, buttercup!
I think I totally dated myself with that quote....
Anyways, What is more scary. A Werewolf or a Vampire?
Personally I go for Werewolf. They're big, unpredictable, and really have no qualms with knocking your head off with a swipe of the claw. You also can't kill them with anything by a silver bullet.
And because vampires can sometimes be pussies *cough* Anne Rice *cough*. Sorry...not a big fan of the Anne Rice vamps. I can't get scared of a puffy faced whiny Brad Pitt who has better hair than me....that bitch.
When 30 Days of Night was announced, I became really excited. This was because it looked like an honest to God SCARY vampire film. As some of you who have been following the blog, I have a general indifference towards the vampire genre. Vampires just don't do it for me really. While I find the concept intriguing, I never found the species that frightening at all. Angsty, poetic, and mysterious? Sure. Scary? Well you might as well dress my 8th grade poetry loving English teacher up in a cape and have her "lurk" at me. That would probably induce the same amount of fear that a vampire would.
But 30 Days of Night?
Aw yeah. Promising.
30 Days of Night looked on par with Near Dark (The only vampire movie to ever scare me.). So I researched the film like a good little nerd and found out that 30 Days was based on a graphic novel of the same name. Double geek score! And of course, the one thing I wanted to do was dig my meat hooks into the graphic novel before the film came out. Luckily one of our readers and good friend of mine, Nojh sent me the box set of the 30 Days of Night graphic novel trilogy. I promised him my first born son and since he didn't want that I promised to buy him some Anime he wanted...which I have yet to deliver on. Unfortunately these novels solidified my now tried and true rule. Never read the book before seeing the movie! Because about 99% percent of the time the movie is just a dim comparison of the material its based upon. For me 30 Days of Night the movie was in that 99%. Damn it all. Now don't get me wrong, 30 Days of Night isn't a crap film. It's actually pretty well done. The problem is, the graphic novel is better. And my expectations going in to see this film were a bit high.
For those of you who do not know the graphic novel or the film BEWARE! THAR BE SPOILERS AHEAD!!
The Graphic Novel of 30 Days of Night is virtually the exact same story as the film. A group of vampires descend on the small Alaskan town of Barrow during the winter when the sun is down for 30 days. Chaos and blood ensues. The interesting thing about 30 Days the graphic novel is that its written like a fable. The action is briefly described and the characters are a bit vague. Its less a fleshed out piece of literature and more of a cautionary tale told over a campfire. You can get through each book in a day. What carries the novel is the beautifully grotesque art and the story line. After reading this I felt it was perfect to put to film. With many other books to movie adaptations you lose a lot of the small details, subplots, and character quirks leaving the Cliff Notes addition to fill the screen. But with 30 Days of Night, you can easily transfer the fable like story to the screen without losing a thing. You even have room for additions too. The attack on the town was not very detailed in the novel and relied on the moody art to covey its terror. In a film version you have room to expand. And 30 Days, the film did do this its benefit. The attack sequences were wonderful. The first couple being mauled, the good friend hiding under the house after he's been turned, the old senile man constantly stepping out of hiding forgetting the situation, and my favorite and the one that really gets under my skin, the "human bait" scene. Each one of these scenes were perfectly orchestrated for suspense and terror. Also, the portrayal of the vampires were spot on. The shark eyed, mouth full of razors, animalistic blood suckers were perfect to give me the chills. Finally, a screen vampire (that wasn't Bill Paxton) to scare me! Danny Huston was perfect as the lead vampire Marlow. He was everything I'd want in a vampire leader; creepy, calculating, cold blooded...slightly attractive which really disturbs me about how I think. The addition of the vampires speaking their own language was also stellar and alienated the audience even more from them.
So what went wrong for me?
While the film did do a great job expanding the action and terror, it ignored some really great and even franchise building character moments that were in the book. The book was written fable style, but there were two great subplots that were completely ignored in the film; the vampire hunters and the other vampires. Also, the portrayal of our two heroes in the film, Eben and his wife Stella didn't sit well with me either.
The novel had two subplots that were pretty fantastic. And while I understand that in most book to movie adaptations subplots sometimes have to be removed for time and streamline factors, 30 Days the movie really didn't have to omit them. The movie had plenty of room to include both subplots but still keep the story streamlined and keep the running time under two and a half hours.The vampire hunter subplot was small but lead into a huge plot point in the second novel, which I heard was in the works for a movie. In 30 Days, the novel we're introduced to a woman and her son in New Orleans who are Hell bent on proving to the world that vampires exist. They find out about the attack on Barrow and the son heads off on a mission to not save the the down but only to document the attack and come back to report to the world. I felt this subplot gave the audience a larger scope of the vampires. They didn't just pop up in Alaska, they were everywhere. And from a commercial standpoint, this would give a great lead in to a movie sequel.
The other vampires was a subplot that I really felt was needed to give the vampires a bit more depth. While I loved how they were portrayed as pack animals, the idea that they had enough human in them to be organized and calculating was the scary part. We had glimpses of their intelligence in the film. The graphic novel expanded on this more. We found out that not only where there more vampires than Marlow's little band of misfits but that all the other vampires were really pissed off at Marlow's plan for an Alaskan feeding orgy feeling it will expose their species to humans. This ended in a creepy show down between Marlow and the head honcho of the vampire world right in the middle of Barrow which eventually lead to a good chunk of the town's destruction. This also lead to a rather large war between the humans and the vampires in the second book. While I can understand omitting the vampire hunter's subplot since it can be glazed over in the second movie, I felt the other vampires subplot really added to the overall mood of the piece and was pretty vital to the essence of the vampires. It also made a much better reason for the vampires to burn the town than Marlow's sudden change of heart about what they were doing.
I also wasn't too happy with the portrayal of Eben and Stella in the film. When reading 30 Days the graphic novel Eben and Stella were happily married. Not only happily married but I also had the feeling that they were much older possibly in their late thirties or early forties. The stars of our film Josh Hartnett and Melissa George appeared to be much younger. Not only younger but hyper good looking. I'm sure this sounds like a nit picky thing but I felt making the two main characters of the movie young and hot pushed 30 Days the film into typical horror movie cliche land. Who will save us? The beautiful people of course! They were fine in their rolls but I craved to have older more experienced actors as Eben and Stella. They were the sheriffs in the harsh Alaskan territory. I'm not saying all Alaskans are beaten and withered but I am saying is that you'd have a wee bit more experience in your eyes than your average beautiful movie star. Also, was it necessary to have them be separated? It seemed like just another typical movie cliche to have their marriage in turmoil only to be brought back together by crisis. We've seen it so many times in movies (Die Hard, Outbreak, Saw 3, etc etc.) Why not have the older married couple that was portrayed in the graphic novel? To me that seems more mundane and makes the crisis they encounter twice as terrifying.
I'm sure it sounds like I'm tearing this movie a new one. It really isn't a horrible film. And if I had never read the graphic novel first, chances are I'd have liked it a lot more than I do. I do recommend it to anyone who is curious about it. But unfortunately its not a classic like Near Dark is. It feels shallow. Fantastic creatures and great suspense but without the extra bits of character it needs to back it all up. If they only kept in most if not all the nuances of the novel I really believe it could have been a classic vampire film. Right now, I can only classify it as "Good and worth a rental".
Okay, disclaimer time.... I'm working on little sleep and I'm feeling incoherent. So this is going to be REALLY unfocused. REALLY unfocused.
There is your warning.
So without further ado. I really love John Carpenter movies. And I'm not just saying that because of Halloween. Not that Halloween isn't awesome. Its a classic, a staple in the horror genre, and imitated but every other horror film out there. Yes Halloween is awesome. But My love for John Carpenter started with his other films. Films like The Thing, Big Trouble in Little China, Vampires, and They Live are the films where I developed my love of his work....well okay, its where I developed a love of his male characters. Of course, my favorite films of his are probably the most macho ones he's made. Which makes me completely fascinated by his most macho males. If you've been reading this blog you've known by now that I'm a lady who loves her ladies tough. And lets face it, most of his females are not very strong. Actually most of them are whiny, whorish, both, or not even present in the film. But that's neither here nor there. I actually love Carpenter men because of the machismo. There's something about a buffed up blustering guy sporting a mullet that is extremely entertaining to me. Hypnotic as well. No, its not the mullet. I think the reason the overblown testosterone works for me with his movies is that the characters are both charming and almost borderline parody. Jack Burton in Big Trouble in Little China is so hilariously inept that his bad ass boasting is completely charming to me. Maybe I have a crush on Jack Burton? Yeah, probably. Its not the mullet though. I swear to God its not.
Its not the jeans tucked into the boots look he's sporting either.
In Vampires, Carpenter created a character that even made James Woods a sexy bastard. Seriously. In any other movie I see James Woods and think "Oh hey, James Woods. He's a great actor." which is in no way a lustful thought. But when watching Vampires I only thought "Must lick Jack Crow!" In big block letters in my head.
Seriously.Hot Liquid Sex.
John Carpenter created a character that even made James Friggin' Woods sexy to me. The man is a wizard!
And don't get me started on Keith David. Seriously. I'm already a huge fan of the cartoon Gargoyles. (Big enough fan that I staff a Gargoyles convention... Don't Judge Me!). Keith David never looked, acted, or sounded more appealing in both The Thing and They Live. Double for They Live.
Even when surly looking.
So my love of these guys are quite the paradox in my head. In real life I would meet these guys and cause them some sort of bodily harm after about two minutes of conversation. In other films I would tear my hair out and scream "DIE ALREADY!!!" at the movie scream. But John Carpenter manages to write these characters into awesome, bad ass, fun, and fascinating fellas. And I really can't get enough of 'em. I can't be alone in this can I? Well most of the followers are men so I may well possibly be.
Also, did you ever notice that the Masculinity in his movies almost boarder lines on homoerotic? Just me? Okay..um...moving on.
In other words, I'm trying to spark a discussion in the comments section.
Warning, I am completely unfocused and thinking a lot of the up coming Pedicure I have after I get home from work. So read at your own risk.
I was listening to a Cadaver Lab Podcast episode about the Vampires( Oh and if you're reading this. Sam. I feel your Noob pain, man. I am in the same boat). I'll admit, I originally started listening to it because Stac left the guys a rather hilariously perverted message on there. Lets face it, the woman is completely obsessed with her magoo. Really. I mean it. Its actually quite charming. But then I believe most of us are a little preoccupied with our genitals at one time or another. But I digress. This article is about Vampire discussion, not Stac's ax-wound..
Now overall, I'm not a huge vampire lover. I'm a zombie girl. Keep in mind when I am talking zombie or vampire I mean in terms of what appeals to me as an audience not which one would I rather do the horizontal bop with. Because if those were my only choices?Yeah, I'd go celibate. And for some reason each paragraph is going back to sex. I'll stop. I promise. I am, as usual, split focused since I'm writing this at work and trying to give good customer service while thinking of blood suckers. Am I babbling? I'm babbling.
Yet despite that vampires are not my #1 ghoul of choice I still like to see vampires in films and I love it when people play with their mythology. Like zombies, the mythos is broad, sweeping, and can pretty much be adapted to anything if you know how to tweak it the right way. In fact, there was a crazy vampire series Stac, her roomie Bevin, and I put together called Wax Lips where we really did one heck of an overhaul on the standard vampire mythos.
I find that there are three types of vampires in the horror genre. At least there are three types that I know about. We have the animalistic vampires (30 Days of Night, John Carpenter's Vampires), the suave angsty vampires (Interview with a Vampire, Dracula), and the bad ass mother fuckers(Blade, Underworld). While all three have their place in the horror world I tend to lean more towards the animalistic style of vampires. What can I say? I like my vamps mean, bitchy and ruthless. I think 30 Days of Night gives us some of the best vampires ever. Overall I think its an okay film (the graphic novel is better) but talk about ruthless, angry, scary mother fuckers! I love the mouth full of shark like teeth and that they had their own language...now if only they could have casted someone else other than Josh Hartnett as Eben...I mean come on. You're WAY too pretty to be that character, man.
The main reason why the animalistic vampire is the most appealing to me is because its the one I find the most scary. To me, having someone tear into you like a rabid badger is far scarier than someone trying to seduce me...well not completely. You should have seen some of the gems that hit on me at comic con. But still. Like zombies, the looks human, seems human but is definitely NOT human factor in the animalistic vampires is what gives me the creeps. Of course I still have yet to watch Let the Right One In (which hopefully will be my main activity tomorrow since its my day off). So my entire perspective may change after that.
Anyways, Lets start some conversation, shall we?
-What do you like best: Animalistic, Bad Ass, or Angsty vampires?
-What is one of the best combos of the three you've seen on film?
-Any style you hate?
-Any style you love?
-Any films to recommend to me? I'm always looking for new things to watch.
-What vampire cliche's do you hate or love?
-What is your ultimate favorite vamp flick?
-What about Stac's magoo? Actually no..that shouldn't be up for discussion.
Feed my Lust for Knowledge!!! I promise I will respond to your comments...after my pedicure. Promise!
Bonuse Material! Here's some trailers of my Favorite Vamp Films
30 Days of Night. (not as good as the graphic novel though. I'll stand by that)
John Carpenter's Vampires. (Its just a lot of fun and worth Watching JUST for James Woods alone.)
Fright Night (So Cheesy, so 80's, so fun.)
Night Watch (Not completely about Vampires but its' freakin AWESOME!)
Near Dark (One of the Best Vampire Movies ever made)
