Monsters Vs Madmen. Round 8!

Once again...I am stunned.

You Killed Severen?!

SEVEREN?!?!

I am at a loss for words...I'm also surprised by the amount of Marlow fans who read this blog. But bravo Senor Pointy Mouth! You have lived to fight another round!

Now you are going up against the strong but silent supernatural type.

Monsters Vs Madmen Round 8 we have:

Marlow from 30 Days of Night

VS

Mahogany from Midnight Meat Train!

For those who still have yet to see Midnight Meat Train go rent it...now. Its friggin' awesome.

Lets see them both in un-embeddable action.

Mahogany has a typical evening at work

Marlow has mad people skillz.

Vote Now! We'll announce the winner next week and the winner will go off to the winner's circle to await the Battle Royal!

3-2-1

FIGHT!!!

Review - Shutter Island

Look at me! Being all relevant and stuff!

I've been chomping at the bit to catch this movie for a really long time now. I'm a bit of a Scorsese fan girl (Though honestly, nothing can beat the masterpiece that is Goodfellas in my opinion). I saw the trailer ages ago in the theater and thought that it looked fantastic. Then I promptly forgot about the film and moved on to other things coming out. I was reminded of it by a couple TV bumpers and seeing it listed on IMDB as an upcoming release. So overall my exposure to the film was kinda nil other than that first trailer I saw oh so long ago. The only thing I really knew about the movie was it was a period piece, it involved an insane asylum, and there was some really creepy imagery in it. Overall I was a complete clean slate. And frankly, that's how I recommend you see this film. The less you know about it, the more intriguing it is.

I don't consider it the best thriller I've ever seen and I don't think its a masterpiece on par with the Departed, Taxi Driver, or Goodfellas. But its extremely intense, beautifully shot, and it had my interest from beginning to end. Definitely in my top five Scorsese films. So in my opinion, it was worth the price of admission and the drive out to the theater.

Even though I don't want to give much of the story away, here's a bit of the basic plot. Teddy Daniels (played by a jittery Leo DiCaprio) is a Federal Marshal who is sent to the infamous Shutter Island asylum to investigate the disappearance of a female patient. And from there its total mind fuck chaos. That's really all you need to know.

Unfortunately I plan to gloss over a lot of this movie because I rather not give anything away. But you can expect a film more along the lines of Silence of the Lambs and Session 9. Actually it has a LOT more in common with Session 9. The group I saw it with figured out the film in a heart beat. I myself really enjoyed the whole unfolding of the story and was always trying to guess what was going on. Now I don't know what that says about me. Maybe I'm an idiot while my friends are super movie savants. But damn it, it had me guessing every frame and never ceased to surprise me.

Visually I loved this movie with a passion. Its as if a Hitchcock film and a Kubrick film had a moody little baby. It uses many of the classic noir looks, lighingt, and at many times monochromatic coloring. Yet the film is sprinkled with crazy cuts to creepy unsettling imagery that hearkens back to The Shining. The music is wonderfully erratic and at first seems almost out of place. As the film goes on you notice how the music is used to create tension and disorientation. Even the acting style is stylized, feeling like the old 1950's noir films which later on falls into more naturalized acting..with reason I assure you. Everything in this film is deliberate and demands that the film be watched again.

There's really not much else I can say about this film without giving it away. And like I said earlier, the best part of the movie is going in completely blank.

If you're looking more for a Scorsese horror film, check out his remake of Cape Fear instead. If you like movies like Session 9, Memento, Silence of the Lambs, or any type of thriller that screws with your mind you'll like Shutter Island. Its not a fast paced gore fest of scare but a intense, well acted, and beautifully shot film. Check it out!

BIRTHDAY ALERT!

Everyone wish Cins a happy birthday today!

Happy birthday to the coolest, weirdest, best cohort a person could be gifted with-- If I ever need to hide a body, I have faith that you'll know the perfect place to plant it! Here's to graveyards, homoerotic subtext in horror sequels, scaring the piss out of each other, scaring fanboys and getting in a fight at Disneyland!

You're the best, oh sister-drag queen!

All choking is done purely out of love!

10 minutes of Terror - Apt Pupil

I told you I'd feature this one.
I believe Apt Pupil is one of the forgotten Stephen King movie gems. Probably because more people consider it a drama than a horror film. But personally I think this is a fantastic psychological horror film. Its not gory or scary in the traditional sense but it's extremely disturbing, intense, and really haunts you after you see it. I hold it more on par with the likes of Silence of the Lambs and Se7en.

In a nutshell, Apt Pupil is about a young troubled man named Todd who finds out that his elderly neighbor, Kurt, was a high ranking Nazi soldier in WWII. So Todd does what any young troubled man would do in a situation like this. He blackmails the shit out of him. The whole film becomes a battle of wills and wits between the two.

This scene is a bit different than the usual scenes I feature on 10 Minutes of Terror mainly because I'm not really analyzing the visual cues but just honoring the amazing acting of Ian McKellen...who I have a HUGE old gay man crush on. Seriously, I want to hang out with this guy for a weekend.
Lets take a look at the infamous (well infamous to me) marching scene.




What I love about this scene the most is the transformation of Ian McKellen's character during his march. It really is a beautiful acting moment that I don't think my words can even describe.
What we see before and through out most of the beginning of the film is a broken man who is desperately trying to hide his secret. In fact at some points in the film you're lead to believe he was just a soldier following orders and is now ashamed. Well this moment is the turning point for his character.
If you just watch his facial expressions, McKellen's transformation is so beautifully subtle. His eyes grow more intense and his jaw becomes more set and his marching grows. His body language is exaggerated yet his face is cold, cruel and almost dead except for that spark in his eyes. At this point you damn well know that this frail old man really is a monster and our dear Todd has just unleashed it again. In fact, this moment here is when the tables begin to turn and the battle of wills really gets intense. Todd is no longer in control, Kurt and his demons are.


I really do think Apt Pupil is worth checking out. Its a fascinating story and the acting is top notch all the way around. If you're into more psychological horror, rent this sucker.

CHALLENGE TWOOOOOO!

This time the challenge shall be something near and dear to my heart: Opulent horror. High camp, lush colors, bizarre stories! The circus of the bizarre, in effect!

Cins, you are challenged to watch: The Abominable Doctor Phibes, starring my true love, Vincent Price as the good doctor. You can watch with friends, get drunk, drop acid, stab a hooker, whatever you think will enhance the viewing. But you are charged to look at it from an artists eyes: the sets and costumes in this movie are gorgeous, and the composition is very masterfully done. So outside of the strange and delightfully silly deaths (death by rat in airplane, for example), you must also look at the aspects of the film that show that A. Vincent Price really was an effing GIFT to the horror community, and B. This really is a beautiful movie to watch.

I predict you shall enjoy!

Best tag line ever! I want this as a poster for in my home. I will put it in the guest room next to a mirror as a pointed commentary. Why? Because. I'm horrible.

Favorites by the King...Well Stephen King

The main reason I'm writing this is because I recently started reading Under The Dome by Stephen King. Now I usually say King's stuff can be very hit or miss with me but eh, I'll admit it, I'm a bit of a fan for the big lug and I like his stuff, at least his early stuff. Right around the time when he was crapping out a new novel every five minutes was when I lost interest in him. But having now read about 200 pages in on Under The Dome, I got to admit that Mr. King has grasped me once again. Its a damn good book!

Its also over 1200 pages so don't expect a full review of this anytime soon from me. I'm a slow reader.

As I read Under The Dome I sense the impending film adaptation looming on the horizon. But to be honest I really hope they give this one the miniseries treatment on cable. This story needs all the gore and nasty atrocities to make it work otherwise the premise seems a bit silly. So a watered down version on CBS is just not going to cut it. Also, as a feature length film it would have to be pretty long to include the vast tapestry of characters that King has created so far. There is a lot going on with this book that I cannot see being crammed in a scant two hours. But then, if you have a good screenwriter anything is possible.

If any reps of Mr. King are reading this? Yeah, Under the Dome miniseries on HBO, baby! PERFECT!

...God I really hope this book doesn't start sucking.

...God I hope no reps of Stephen King reads my blog diarrhea.

In case any of you haven't noticed, I am not the writer on this team. The eloquence of the written word goes to Stac.

I just like writing the word penis a lot.

Penis.

I'm digressing.

Anyways, I started thinking back on some Stephen King movies I liked. I was first introduced to his work via film, being the movie whore that I am. From there, I checked out the books when I could. So here's a list of some of my favorite horror films from The King.

Just to note, I have NOT seen The Myst or Salem's Lot yet. They're on the list though..yes, I'm a bad bad horror fan.

10 -Creepshow

This was one of the first horror films I ever saw as a kid. I watched it mostly through my fingers. And I love to revisit it over and over as an adult. And while all the segments in this movie are awesome, my tops are The Crate and They're Creeping Up On You. I think They're Creeping Up On You is the soul reason why I freak out at bugs.

9 - Needful Things

I know a lot of people think this one is kinda lame but the reason its on my list is because Max Von Sydow gives the most awesome scenery chewing performance ever. Actually all the performances were examples of awesome scenery chewing. WAY melodramatic yet it works for this story...well it works for me. LOVE the camp!

8 - Christine

My asshole brother bought her back in September '57. That's when you got your new model year, in September. Brand-new, she was. She had the smell of a brand-new car. That's just about the finest smell in the world... 'cept maybe for pussy.

I do believe that is one of the greatest lines ever written.
Does anyone else think that early Stephen King and John Carpenter is a film match made in Heaven? Just me? Carpenter lends his testosterone (and vaguely homoerotic) tones to this film and it works beautifully. Christine is underrated. There is just something really creepy and sleazy about this movie that I love...the car is pretty sweet too.

7 -The Dead Zone

I really believe this is the most heart breaking and sad horror films in King's resume. A lot of that I'm sure is due to Christopher Walken's amazing performance and David Chronenberg's directing. Also, the scissors scene is really cringe inducing.

6 -Apt Pupil

Is this considered a horror film? I really believe it's a psychological one. This movie really got under my skin. The acting is fantastic, the story is unique and Ian McKellen's performance is brilliantly understated. The marching scene is completely terrifying and will probably be featured in an upcoming 10 Minutes of Terror. Who knew walking in place could be so scary?

5 - Pet Cemetery

Is he...is he going to kill that kid?...Oh yeah he went there. Pet Cemetery is one of those "Oh he TOTALLY WENT THERE!" films what with child killing, pet killing, creepy devil child returning, and especially the heel slicing. OH GOD THE HEEL SLICING! Mary Lambert directed this one and really did a great job balancing the horror with the emotion of the story making this both frightening and touching.

4 -1408

Once again, I drone on and on about 1408. I love this movie. Its an old fashioned haunted house tale. Its the Shining's bitchy little sister who's pissed she didn't get to see Twilight. Its creepy without the gore. And I'll shut up now since I've already waxed poetic about this movie several times in the past.

3 -Misery

Now THIS is Stephen King's work at its absolute purest and at its peak. Its a simple story about two people and the horror of obsession. This is a true actor's horror film. What I love is it's directed by Rob Reiner, a director who usually does more light hearted comedy like Spinal Tap and The Princess Bride. You can spot a little of his tongue in cheek humor in parts of the movie which really kept the film balanced. And Kathy Bates deserved that frigging Oscar, damn it! She ROCKED this film!

2 -Carrie

I believe Carrie was the first official movie adaptation of Stephen King's work. Believe me when I say overlook the serious 70's style of this film because the story and performances overcome that in the first few frames. A-list actors like Sissy Spacek and Piper Laurie made this one something special. And Carrie's revenge at the climax of the film makes this one of the most satisfying horror films I've ever seen.

1 -The Shining

Yes, I'm fully aware that Stephen King did not really like this adaptation. But Mr. King? This movie rocked. Sorry to contradict you, your book was great and it did deviate from it but COME ON!! Kubrick's detached direction style, the vast starkness of the setting, and the minimalist score created one of the most frightening films ever made. Its the Citizen Kane of horror films....But I still don't really get the bear suit blow job scene.

So those are my favorites! I have to admit, Under The Dome has made me want to go back and read more Stephen King. Its been years since I've read his work and now I'm renewed in my love for his weird stories.

Any suggestions?

Movie Challenge Review - The Thing From Another World

Before I get started...
Monsters Vs. Madmen! So far we have two votes and a shit ton of investment spam and Japanese porn. And its a tie..So go vote for your favorite vampire! Severen vs Marlow! Go On! Dooo EEEEET!!

And now back to your regularly scheduled post.

So last week I declared it Black and White week for our first movie challenge. Stac threw The Thing From Another World in my direction to review. The last time I saw that movie I believe I was a freshmen in high school. And I didn't remember much about it other than I enjoyed it so I was pretty happy with revisiting the film.

Now, a little word about black and white horror films. I really don't think they get enough credit out there in blogger land. And I'm sure a lot of it has to do with both the ages of bloggers out there as well as a whole aesthetic in old black and white films that sometimes can't translate to other generations. Way back in the day, you couldn't fall back on CGI or massive Technicolor gore to get your point across so a lot of these older films relied on atmosphere, acting, and set up. In other words, there was a whole lot of less is more going on. The acting also is a bigger and broader. This is because film was still considered a new media and actors were still trained for the stage. I love old black and white horror films because of those reasons. Unfortunately they can also be viewed as campy, dated, and dull as shit. And while there are some shitty black and whites out there that are all three, I don't think all black and whites should be written off. Many of those films are creepy as Hell. The best way to view an old B&W is to simply put yourself into the shoes of the viewer back in the day and try to watch the film with unjaded eyes. And that's how I watched, The Thing From Another World. And that's also why I did enjoy it. So to all you young whipper snappers out there who read this blog; if you have not given old black and white horror a chance, I highly recommend you do. Stac and I will be happy to give you some recommendations if you want! I just don't think its a genre that should be skipped over.
And I'm off my soap box.

The Thing from Another World is the original 1951 film that John Carpenter's The Thing was a remake of. Its basically the same plot of some scientists and army folk are up in the Antarctica and encounter an alien force that wants to destroy them and more than likely the human race as well. The differences of course, are in the details. Where as Carpenter's remake was an awesome action gore fest, the original was more of a tense chamber drama. That's where the big difference is. Does it make it a bad film? Oh Hells no! Just VERY different.

Like I said, the movie is very much a chamber drama. Instead of seeing wacky gore effects, spaceships crashing, and an alien killing everything it sees, we get descriptions of it from our characters. The film has a few exterior shots in the beginning but overall it takes place in small cramped places on the military base, giving it a sense of claustrophobia. We don't really see the alien a whole lot other than hints here at there like a dead dog hidden in a crate, an arm left behind, noises, broken windows..etc etc. Its a really fantastic way to keep the tension up. And I will admit, the alien was a bit on the lame side when you see it so the less I saw it, the more into the film I was. Its not horrible rubber suit territory but it always looked better when you got glimpses or if it was lit from behind. Keep in mind that is my modern day aesthetic talking.

The whole film feels a lot like a play. In fact I think it would have made an AWESOME stage play. The dialog is sharp and smart and is really the star of the film. Its fast paced in that wonderful late 40's/early 5o's film noir/girl Friday films that were popular back in the day. There are also a lot of great jokes in there that slip by so fast in the rapid fire pace. Keep your ears open and listen to the lines. Its the best part of the movie.

I found the movie had more in common with Aliens than I did with its own remake. While you watch it, you can see a lot of things James Cameron borrowed. The use of the Geiger counter tracking how close the alien was, the sharp humor and camaraderie amongst the military folk, the feeling of being trapped inside while something outside wants to get to you. A lot of that you see in The Thing From Another World and its really surprising. I'm almost tempted to watch this and Aliens back to back to see how many parallels there are.

But my favorite part of the film?
Nikki, played by Margaret Sheriden.
She is our heroine and that bitch was AWESOME. For a woman in a horror/sci-fi film in the 50's, Nikki had a ton of guts and brains. Never once did she shriek and recoil in terror. She not only saved a lot of our military folks butts by being the smart collected one, I am sure given the chance she'd go after that alien herself using just a nail file and a hair pin. MOXY. Nikki has it!

So overall? Fantastic classic black and white film. While I tend to like my old movies a bit more visually atmospheric like Night of the Living Dead, Psycho, and Carnival of Souls, this one still won me over with its dialog and theater presentation. I now remember why I enjoyed it so much when I first saw it.
Oh and for Stac, The Ghost Host from The Haunted Mansion in Disneyland is in this movie. Its hard NOT to spot that voice. He plays one of the douchey scientists.

So there you go!
Your Turn Stac! ;D

Monsters Vs Madmen...IS BACK!?! Round 7!

Holy Shit! I almost forgot about this!
Well I forgot then was wracking my brain for a new opponent then I saw cheesecake and well yeah...forgot.
Anyways, On with the fighting!

Alas...
Candyman, we hardly knew ye. But you DID last two rounds AND you were neck and neck with Severen there for a while! My hooked avenger, you almost made it.

So Severen made it to the next round...and I have to admit I was rooting for him simply because Bill Paxton has never been sexier, damnit!

BUT will Severen live against a new foe? One of his OWN kind!?

Round 7 Monsters vs. Madmen we have:

The frighteningly hawt Severen from Near Dark

VS

The I'm frightened I FIND him hawt, Marlow from 30 Days of Night.

Vampire vs Vampire!!

Yup. We got the devil may care violence of Severen up against the cold calculated leadership of Marlow. Okay, for ME this a close one.

Lets see them in action. Unfortunately the videos are not embeddable so click below!

Marlow uses a gal as human bait and gives his pals a snack

And Severen...is still a dick.

Shout out your votes in the comments area and we'll tally them up and announce the winner next week.

3,2,1 - FIGHT!

Movie of the Week - Grace

Yet ANOTHER movie that has been sitting on my table for months and I never picked it up to watch until now.
Warning to any pregnant women who read this blog! You may want to pass on Grace until you've given birth and the baby has stopped teething!

So in a nutshell: Grace is about a young woman named Madeline who has finally gotten pregnant after many failed attempts. Unfortunately, she is in a car accident which kills both her husband and her unborn child. Despite the dead child, Maddy still decides to carry the baby to term and miraculously, she wills the baby back to life. But there is something horribly HORRIBLY wrong with her baby girl. Suspense, insanity, and some of the most disturbing scenes of breast pumping ensue.

I assure you, the synopsis does not even give the details and subplots of this movie any justice. But I don't want to give anything away so I'm being very vague here.

At first I really wasn't' sure what to make of Grace. It sounded interesting overall but I've always been more of a fan of campy horror. The whole disturbing horror sub genre tends to get too much under my skin and I'm upset, disturbed, and depressed for days. So I was almost afraid to watch this one for a while. Well I've decided that I'm kind of an idiot for sitting on this sucker for so long because it was definitely one I enjoyed.
What I loved so much about Grace was how extremely subtle it all was. While it did have gore and some disturbing context, it was all done in a minimalist manner. This, I believe puts less emphasis on the horror that baby Grace isn't natural and more on what lengths people would go to to protect their child. And watching Maddy's decent into madness was far more frightening than anything Grace was. To the audience, Grace just appeared to be a normal healthy baby girl. The only main clues we gets to things not being right are how she attracts flies (Beautifully shown with the tons of pest strips hanging around the crib) and that she has a very bad smell that doesn't come from her diaper. and that's all that was really needed.
The story is dominated by very strong females. But this is far from a "Girl Power!" film. Actually, every woman in this movie is pretty screwed up in the head. The director does walk that fine line between "deeply flawed characters" and "The Bitch be crazy!" with this story and manages to create some very real women that were in no way insulting to me as a female. They could have easily slipped into crazy bitch territory and have gotten campy but luckily the performances remained subtle and creepy. BIG props go out to the two main actors in this movie. Jordan Ladd as Maddy was wonderfully haunting. The obsession she has for her baby reads in her eyes from start to finish. and Gabrielle Rose as Maddy's controlling mother-in-law Vivian was flawless.

Visually the movie was impressive. The picture quality changed from brightly lit, colorful, and crystal clear in the beginnings of the film then deteriorated slowly and subtly to fuzzed edges and washed out tones as Maddy begins to lose her mind. It also contains one of the few moments of gore at the end that really startled me.

Grace is a slow burn of a movie. Its not action packed or gore filled but gives you a deep sense of dread and disturbance as the movie goes on. I truly enjoyed this movie and I feel like it should be considered a classic of the genre. So overall, it gets one of my highest recommendations.

Creepy Kitch's First Screener!

Yes...the blog has arrived, folks! Because Creepy Kitch was sent its first movie screener!
Well okay this really is all due to the awesomeness of Johnny from Freddy In Space who tossed my address to the film makers. But still, I feel special now. And a special feeling Cins is a happy Cins. And a happy Cins means no human sacrifices tonight in the village!

Anyways, I was sent a rather impressive looking package for the movie Evil Things. A great cover letter from the "FBI" and a spiffy looking DVD as well. I dashed over to the website www.evilthingsmovie.com and took a look at the trailer. I believe this movie may be right up my alley. It looks like a great slasher shakey cam film...and I am a HUGE sucker for a shakey cam film.
So take a look at the website and check out the trailer! I hopefully will be posting a review of this sucker this week so keep an eye out!
Until then, I'm going to bask in the idea that someone felt Creepy Kitch was important enough to send a screener to.
Pardon me, I'm off to preen.

Review - My Name Is Bruce

Before I get started, I want to post a quick amendment to my favorites of the decade list I did last week.

How...HOW could I have left out one of my all time favorite horror films ever?! Because I was sure it came out in 1999, not 2000, that's why. Next time I need to research better. ANYWAYS:

American Psycho

This movie is one of my favorites. It walks that wonderful fine line between horror and satire and does it perfectly. I was a Christian Bale fan back in the time of Newises (Don't Judge Me!). So seeing him finally shake the little sensitive boy persona he was getting shoehorned into for a while was great....and he was half naked through most of the movie which ain't half bad either. It's frighteningly shallow and also has the BEST chainsaw chase scene ever.



Okay, now I feel better.



On with the Review!



I had, My Name Is Bruce on my Netflix instant cue for a while. The boys at Cadaver Lab mentioned it many episodes ago and I tossed it up...and promptly forgot about it. A few months and several bottles of wine later I turned the sucker on and watched it.

In a nutshell, My Name Is Bruce is about a small town called Gold Lick that is being terrorized by a Chinese spirit, (and protector of bean curd) Guan-Di. In an act of desperation, a young teenager and die hard Bruce Campbell fan hunts down said actor, clubs him over the head, and hauls him back to Gold Lick hoping Bruce can save them all. Bruce is convinced this is just a movie shoot. Hilarity (And I mean it this time) ensues.

Now I will admit that this movie will make absolutely NO sense if you're not a Bruce Campbell fan. It's pretty self referential and definitely made for his followers. So if you don't know who Bruce Campbell is or if you barely heard of him, don't bother with this movie....but since this is a horror blog I'm going to assume you all are fans of El Bruce-o. This movie is absurd. And I mean that in the most positive way possible. Bruce Campbell not only directed this movie but was also a writer on the film. Its full of a lot of in jokes for the fans as well as plays off of Bruce's most famous character persona, Ash. So Bruce portrays himself as a blustering, self centered, egomaniac in his usual charming manner. You're really not getting a movie about Bruce Campbell but a movie about the crazy persona that Bruce Campbell puts out there on the screen....which really makes me wonder what the real Bruce Campbell is really like. I'm pretty sure he doesn't live in a trailer...or drinks hooch out of a dog bowl.

The movie is low budget and when I mean low budget, I mean LOW BUDGET. The special effects are awful and scenery chewing is epic. Yet I'm positive it was all done on purpose. The amount of camp and wackiness this film unloads is fantastic from the fake blood to Ted Raimi playing multiple parts in a bad wig and moustache. It all fits in with Bruce Campbell's King of Schlock title. Not only fits in, but milks the shit out of it! It does get a little slow in parts and at times is a bit all over the place with its cheesiness. But El Bruce-o keeps you interested with his charm and chin...even when he's playing himself as a big ol' douche bag.

Its a really fun film overall. If you're in the mood for a silly movie and lots of Bruce love this is worth the rental. But if you're not a fan, best to skip this one.

10 Minutes of Terror: The Exorcist III

Hey Folks!
This one is a short and sweet scene that I feel the need to include in 10 Minutes of Terror. Its actually not even close to being 10 minutes...more like a 58 seconds.
I make it no secret that I absolutely love The Exorcist III. Is it as good as the original? Nope. And yes it DOES have Fabio in an angel costume which is just fucking weird.
But I really feel that the Exorcist III tried its best to keep the feel of the original Exorcist and for the most part, it succeeded.
But I digress. This post is about my favorite scene in the film. The Nurse Station Scene aka., The White Sheet Scene.

Lets take a look.



This moment happens right after the nurse in the red sweater goes to check on a patient and ends up getting a little jump scare from something harmless. Is it a cheap ploy to lure you into something bigger? Oh yeah. But it works. And it works well.
Now when I hunted this scene down on youtube I was surprised to see the entire sequence was less than a minute. The first time I saw it, it fell like eternity. But that just goes to show you how well they were able to build up the tension in this short scene. The stationary long shot is so far away that you can't make out anyone's features. It also has the qualities of a security camera which gives a very voyeuristic feel. The colors in the scene were drab and cold, even the background people were in colors that disappeared. This made the nurse's sweater stand out and you can't help but watch that sweater the entire moment. The entire scene is very mundane. No score, nothing urgent happening, and you can't even see expressions on people's faces to get any clue of what could be happening with them. It creates a blank canvas that lures you into a false sense of security.
Then BAM! Money shot! That weird shrill horn and a fast zoom in to...what the hell IS that anyways?!...Yes I know its an old lady in a sheet but the first time I saw that it went so fast that I jumped and thought maybe it was a creature instead of a person. I'd also like to point out the horrific device the sheeted person is carrying. We do find out that its a device used in Autopsies...charming.

I really do love this scene. The Exorcist III does have its faults yes. And The movie itself is more creepy and atmospheric than truly scary. But its extremely interesting and has some great acting involved. I highly recommend tossing this up on the Netflix if you haven't seen it.

Creepy Kitch is 1 Year Old!

Mmmm....zombie head cheese.

Well Technically it will be Creepy Kitch's Birthday tomorrow. But since tomorrow's Thanksgiving, both Stac and I will probably be stuffing our bellies full with Turkey and the blood of young virgin men. Still one year of blogging is nothing to sneeze at, especially since Stac and I have the attention spans of kittens on cocaine. It seems like just yesterday I IMed Stac with "Hey..I got an idea."

I wanted to give some quick shout outs to a few people in particular:

Nojh: He's our die hard regular in the comments section. Thanks for always giving us a read, sticking with us from the begining. and striking up some wonderful conversations around here!

Johnny from Freddy In Space: Johnny has been busy as heck lately but he still has found the time to always promote us or give us blogger advice. Without him or Freddy In Space there would probably be no Creepy Kitch. So thanks Johnny, for all the inspiration! You set the bar for us and hopefully we'll rise to it!

Mike and Sam from Cadaver Lab: You guys rule. You've been our cheerleaders and you always give us shout outs on your podcast whenever you can. And we REALLY appreciate it. Stac and I always get warm fuzzies when you mention our blog in glowing terms...hell we get warm fuzzies even when you talk about our perversions. Thank you for all of that!


To ALL our Readers: I wanted to give a shout out thanks to all you folks who have been reading us for this long or have just popped in and decided to stay. You guys make this blog fun for us! We have a small group of readers but all of you guys have been awesome. Thank You!


And a special shout out from Cins to her partner in crime, Stac: Stac, you're the best writer on here and I could not have been able to keep this thing going a whole year without you. Thanks for going along with my wack-a-doodle ideas. Here's to one more year of blogging insanity!

So thanks again all! And have a happy Thanksgiving!!!

So I FINALLY saw Paranormal Activity

...and I do believe I will never sleep again.

No fooling.

An old friend of mine texted me yesterday morning asking if I'd like to catch a showing of Paranormal Activity that night. I was really interested in the film after I saw the commercial for it on TV so I was up for it. Besides, its hard for me to actually see movies like this in the theater simply because my beloved husband, creep though be may be, refuses to watch movies about ghosts and spirits that look even remotely scary. Its his preference. I don't bug him about it since I have an aversion to watching documentaries on how one puts together an AK-47 or the history of cheese. Luckily our friend has my back in the world of haunting movies.

I was pretty skeptical going into it too. usually when a film gets hyped so much as "The scariest movie of the year!" or "Not since The Exorcist!" or what have you I snort and think "Yeah, right." Well this time I will have to agree with the reviewers. This movie is a pitch perfect example on how to build tension and terror.

In a nutshell, Paranormal Activity centers around a couple in San Diego who video tape the strange happenings in their house. And as the nights go on things get worse and worse and worse. Terror ensues. That's really all I want to mention about the plot because I found going into the film spoiler free makes the journey through the film all the better.

...but I will bring up some spoilers at the end of this.

I remember hearing a documentary on horror films defining the difference between horror and terror. Horror is the aftermath of something bad. Terror is the waiting for it. This movie is not a horror film. It is a terror film. The approach is simple and yes we have seen this all before. But its less about the subject matter and more about the execution that makes Paranormal Activity as frightening as it is. The film effects are simple. Noises here, movement there, and hints of very bad things along the way. That's really all you need for your imagination to fill in the rest. The film makers slowly gave you teaspoons of information as the film goes on. Things that you'd probably not think much of at first. But that information sits in the back of your mind and while the film unravels, that information comes back to haunt you...no pun intended.

I also loved how our two lead characters, Katie and Micah looked like ordinary folk. neither of them were stick skinny, or super buff or hyper good looking. They both looked like someone you would bump into at the supermarket. For me, that normalcy took the protective fourth wall away and made the film feel real.

And at this moment that is all I can say about the movie without giving away any spoilers. I will discuss spoilers below because I have the undying need to do so! But if you have not seen Paranormal Activity yet I highly recommend going into it spoiler free.

So wait for the spoilers if you've seen the movie....

Until then enjoy this picture of zombies in a shopping mall.

...

...

...

All set now?

Okie Dokie then.

Things I noticed and loved about Paranormal Activity was how the film set you up for a pattern. you got you back ground information and character development in the day time shots, then you have your terror in the evening shots in the bedroom. Every time that camera was on the tripod and you saw that time counter in the corner you knew something bad was going to happen. When that pattern was broken, you knew the haunting/possession was getting worse.

I have to give a lot of credit to the actors (both who used their real names in this movie). Katie Featherson's wide eyed expressions and her bone chilling scream were amazing. Not to mention her motionless hovering over the bed and those devilish grins she'd give the camera when she became fully possessed by the demon sent chills down my back. I also have to say Micah Sloat did an excellent job coming across as the douchiest boyfriend ever.

I noticed people complaining that Micah was too much of a douche. But without him this film wouldn't have worked. This movie isn't just about a wacky demon coming to get'cha. This movie is about a very flawed relationship between a controlling man and a codependent woman. And you begin to see the cracks in their "perfect" relationship as the possession gets worse.

Micah drove the bus in this relationship. He wants to so desperately to be in control that he ultimately puts himself and Katie in danger all for the sake of his stubbornness. Yes Micah did everything wrong in this situation. He mocked, threatened, and tried to communicate with the demon despite everyone who told him not to. Why? Because he refused to give up control of the situation. In Micah's mind, he was right and not even the threat of losing his girlfriend could detour that. Did I want to beat him? Yes. If I was in that relationship I probably would have punched Micah in the face before seeking the nearest priest after the first door slam. But I am a different woman from Katie. Katie was so very codependent on Micah that she just couldn't muster up the courage to either leave or seek help on her own. They hinted at it in the beginning with how uncomfortable she was with the camera but grinning and bearing it because its what Micah wanted. Then it becomes the most obvious when, despite her anger with him for unapologetically bringing a Ouija board into the house, she still needs to curl up with him in bed. It made you want to shake her and it made the idea of the film progress in a believable manner without asking the age old question "why don't you get out and get help!?".

I'd say if there was one major flaw in the film, it would have to be the very quick flash of CGI at the end. While it didn't ruin the movie, I felt it wasn't necessary at all to make the movie any more scary. I would have preferred it if it went to black on Katie smiling at the screen as she hovered over Micah's body. But that is just a minor complaint. The movie was a fantastic nerve wracking watch that I am dying to see again.

I will definitely be picking this one up on DVD.

10 Minutes of Terror - Scream

Aaaand Its BACK.

I recently saw Scream again on cable and I felt it REALLY needed to be included in 10 Minutes of Terror. I stayed away from Scream for a while considering the sequels were eh and its been so copied and over done that I got sick of it. Watching it again after keeping away for so many years made me realize that this film is really damn good. I remembered how much I liked it when I first saw it.

Granted, Scream has now become extremely cliche like just about any horror franchise (Nightmare, Friday the 13th, Saw, etc. etc.) But believe me when I say that when the movie came out, it was fresh and fantastic. Back in the oh so cynical 90's (ah, my generation!) the whole slasher in the woods scenario was tired out after countless sequels. The whole rise of the sexy "intellectual" thriller chiller genre was at its peak and was becoming REALLY over done (if I see Sharon Stone's ass ONE more time...). So when Scream came along my friends and I let out a collective "Hooray!" at the arrival.
Okay yeah, the concept of Scream wasn't what you'd call different but the execution of the film was. Here we had a horror film where the characters were smart and savvy about their situation. To me, this made the movie even more frightening. Even equipped with the knowledge of horror film lore these kids were still getting picked off one by one by one. Would us die hards stand a chance?...well...probably against Skeet Ulrich yes but thats not really the point I'm making. It was a slasher film made for a generation who grew up on slasher films.

And while it is now the most cliche part of all in the film, the opening sequence is still a pitch perfect delivery of a teenager in terror. Wes Craven created a masterwork scene of slasher heaven!

Here's the scene. Not embeddable though. DOH!

Go watch.
I shall wait here and enjoy my cookie.
....mmm...cookie.
Done? Okay. On we go.



When I first experienced this opening scene I was scared out of my gourd. I was scared enough to chew on my own knee. THAT is scared, people! To have a wet spot on one's knee from your own mouth is to know fear.
But lets take a closer look at the scene shall we?
Keep in mind this movie was made during the rise of the cellphone. Having a killer stalk someone using a cellphone was completely unheard of due to the fact that...well...there were no cell phones before then. Using this unexplored technology at the time was not only unique but added an extra note of terror. Something used for convenience could also be used to conveniently dispose of you. Many films after that has used this device since. Also, notice how the loudest sound during this scene is the phone ringing. The ringing goes from mundane to almost an alarm, jolting you every time the killer calls back. We also have a subtle use of color going on here. Our victim is in white or light tones with light blond hair painting us a picture of innocence. Meanwhile she is being stalked by a hooded figure all in black. Its costuming 101 but it works.

But I think what I loved so much was the use of setting for this scene. Putting lil Drew in a house that was mostly windows was a great idea. I'm a pretty paranoid woman. I tend to put shades on all my windows for fear that some lazy eyes psycho is going to be peering in on me while I watch TV. So before anything happened in this scene I was already paranoid. Windows EVERYWHERE and not a shade pulled down over one of them. One can't help but feel watched with all those windows looking out into the darkness. A good sturdy chair can break your barier and you are knife fodder.

Trust me when I say that this movie was something special when it came out. Was it the best horror film ever? Not compared to some. But it is extremely well made, it jump started the genre back into the mainstream, and its just plain fun to watch. Despite the cliches it harbors now, it really is worth checking out again.

The New Spooky Adventures of Stac and Cins!

Creepy Kitch's Halloween Saw Contest Ends Saturday! Hurry And Enter! Details can be found here!

This a post I meant to make waaaay back in the day after the Stac and Cins convergence happened. In the usual tradition, Stac and I planned to take the San Diego Ghosts and Gravestones Tour and as usual, the tour fucked up our reservations and we ended up getting no tour and $50 in the hole....until I reamed them over the phone to get our money back.

Its FATE I tell you!

God does NOT want us to go on that tour!

Undaunted and somewhat tipsy after a bottle of wine, we convinced my poor suffering serial killer husband to drive us and our friend Tanya out to Old Town San Diego to investigate the old grave yard which I don't believe officially has a name. But it is there and has been there for at least 100 years or so. I've only walked past it a couple times during my short time working in Old Town (selling theater tickets whilst wearing a smelly vest. GOOD TIMES!). Stac had no clue it was there. So I figured now was a time as good as any to check it out! So we headed on over.

If you've been reading this blog you probably know my now that Stac and I are very novice (and I mean NOVICE as in not even CLOSE to being a ghost hunter) ghost hunters. We like to go to reportedly haunted spots and take photos. About 99% of the time we end up with zilch (except for that one time). And with me being a supernatural black hole, our experiences tend to be pretty dull, consisting of Stac and I guessing what we might see...then nothing happening.

This was SO not the case this time.

We went on a Friday evening. Old Town is a hot place for tourists on Friday, especially during the summertime. The cemetery was pretty quiet though we we arrived. For the most part is was Tanya, Stac, and me. The hubby stayed behind at the restaurant to chat with some friends then caught up later. It was a peaceful place, though it was underlined with a bit of an eerie feeling. We took some photos and got some orbs but we didn't think much of them because of all the dust in the area. The three of us figured it would be a bust but at least it was pretty scenery and some interesting history.

I noticed one head stone had some sort of flower decoration on it. It didn't look too old and it was rather pretty so I snapped a photo of it, forgetting I had the flash on. Needless to say the picture came out like ass. So I tried again. Apparently someone else thought otherwise and just as I was about to take another photo my camera shut down completely. Weird. I checked the batteries before we left and my camera had no history of acting up before this moment. I switched it on and it appeared to be fine so I tried again. And poof, it shut down again. I had a feeling that something didn't want me taking that photo so I just stepped away and moved on. My camera worked fine the rest of the time we were there as long as I didn't take photos of that one headstone.

And that's when a gaggle of obnoxious tourists came barreling through. One set was being lead by the ghosts and gravestones tour (bastards!) and the others were drunk tourists being general douchcannoes. Maybe its just me, but I always felt that if you're in a place like a cemetery you should friggin' act with some goddamned decorum. Even if the place is over 100 years old....ESPECIALLY if the place is over 100 years old. Its just common courtesy even if most of the occupants are dead. Granted, taking photos of headstones to some is considered obnoxious so maybe I don't have room to talk. But behavior like jumping up and down on graves, pretending to be pissing on head stones, and yelling things like "OOOOH Scary Ghosts come and get meeeee!' seems to trump photo taking and tend to piss me off....a lot. And I don't think I was the only one getting pissed.

Stac, Tanya, and I were tending to ourselves, taking photos quietly and reading headstones while this was going on. Now this wasn't a dramatic moment. No doors were blown off hinges, no lighting from the sky, or anything of that nature. But it was a moment that hit the three of us pretty hard. We were suddenly hit with overwhelming feeling of anger and sadness. I'm sure part of it was my own hostilities towards dumb tourists. But there was no reason for me to be feeling that enraged before. Stac was hit was well but when we chatted about it later, she told me she felt horribly saddened by it all and had to step away to compose herself. I believe the tourists felt it too because as soon as I was overcome with these feelings, the tourists stopped their shenanigans and got quiet. I heard one mutter "We should go...now" and they scattered out of there like their asses were on fire. The feelings went down considerably after the assbags left. But those feelings remained. I also noticed these feelings were strongest the further back we went in the cemetery.

Now this is going to sound cheesy. But I swear this is exactly what happened. Before we entered the cemetery, Stac picked a spring of rosemary on her way in. She was holding it during our adventures. I'm not sure what possessed her to do this but while the three of us were trying to muddle through the angry and sad vibes all around us, Stac took part of that rosemary, tied the bottom with a piece of ribbon she had in her pocket, and placed it on one of the graves. I don't remember what she said exactly but it was along the lines of sorry that happened and that the three of us don't mean any disrespect and we'll definitely remember this place. As soon as that happened, BOOM all the nasty vibes were gone and it was completely peaceful again. So whatever Stac did and said, it apparently did the trick.

We were quiet on the way back to my place but later on we discussed it. During that whole incident, my husband was hanging out on the side lines, watching in that adorably creepy way he does. My husband has a knack for reading the dead, much like I have the knack for getting certain vibes off people (usually weird people). He said that the whoevers/whatevers in that cemetery just wanted to be remembered and respected and haven't been for a long while what with all the tourists coming through. I really felt that Stac's words did give whoever/whatever was there some sort of solace.
There's a good chance that Stac and I will visit that place again. It just seems like the right thing.
Perhaps it was just one of those you had to be there stories. But it was definitely amongst one of the weirder ones in my life.

Tomorrow I will post pictures of the place as well. Its a really nice site.

Halloween Movie Madness! Week 8 -Drag Me to Hell

Creepy Kitch's Halloween Saw Contest Ends Saturday! Hurry And Enter! Details can be found here!

Warning...mild spoilers.

So I almost sat my ass down last night and typed up a review of Drag Me to Hell right after I watched it. Unfortunately my computer chair was pirated by my both my husband's best friend and my cat on two separate occasions so it had to wait until today.

So I'll admit it. I am pissed off that I did not go see this movie in the theater. I figured that most of what I was reading was hype so I was expecting this to be fun but not great. No great loss missing it theatrically. WRONG! This was hands down the best horror movie I've seen this year. Seriously. And perhaps I am about to wave my chicken shit flag really high right now but Drag Me to Hell genuinely scared me! Out of all the movies that could scare me, this one did it. Oh it made me laugh too but seriously...SERIOUSLY!!
I'm almost ashamed to admit that.

But obviously not that ashamed.

In a a nutshell: Drag Me to Hell is about a loan officer Christine, who is probably the nicest woman to walk the planet, who denies an old woman an extension on her home loan. Unfortunately this old lady is a Gypsy who apparently has friends in low places and puts a curse on Christine to be dragged to Hell by the demon Lamina...hence the title of the film. Awesome Sam Raimi antics and some really scary moments ensue!

This movie really got under my skin. REALLY (Imagine my surprise when I found out it was rated PG-13...though I did watch the unrated version). I work in customer service and I'm always on edge waiting for that OH so special person to come in and make my life a living Hell. There have been times when I'm called every name in the book for just doing my job. This movie was my worst nightmare. Now I won't defend Christine's choice in denying the gypsy woman her loan. Morally, doing everything she could to help the lady was the right choice. But unfortunately Christine was having a rough day and appeared to be quite the door mat. And she picked the wrong day to assert herself.

Story wise its pretty basic but what I loved was how Christine was established to be the nicest woman you could meet. This made her plight to save her soul even more agonizing to watch. And watching her cling to that humanity inside her while the demon rains its terror down was fascinating. Alison Lohman created a great character arc going from meek doormat to assertive bitch the worse her situation got. It was touching, heartbreaking, and hilarious.

But this didn't mean that the film was all serious. The movie was laced with signature Sam Raimi gore and gags which had me both jumping and screaming. It was very reminiscent of Evil Dead 2 but walked a more refined line of terror and gags without getting full out goofy and campy...too often. Also, any movie with a cackling evil goat is cinema gold for me. The gore was also very effective, creative, and CLOWNISH! WOO! And while I did see the end coming, it filled me with so much suspense and dread that I watched it with my jaw hanging open. The film remained dark but never overly so which worked. Sometimes films can get so bleak that you wonder "why am I watching this? Its hopeless!" Not this one. I kept second guessing myself and despite what my gut told me, I was still stunned to watch it all happen.

I absolutely loved this movie. Yes it freaked me out. Yes I had nightmares about being cursed (Only in my dreams the gypsy cursed me to live in the Alaskan tundra with no TV or Internet for the rest of my days). But I was blown away by this film. This ranks in my top films of the year and I am going to run out and buy it on bluray as soon as the paycheck comes rolling in.

So my recommendation? See this immediately! I don't endorse blind buying movies at all but this one would be worth it!

Halloween Movie Madness! Week 7 - Zombieland

In case you missed it, Creepy Kitch is running a contest! Go here for more Details!



Holy Shit!
Am I ACTUALLY reviewing a movie I saw in the theater?
Did I actually CATCH a horror film IN the theater?!
This my friends...is a sign of the Apocalypse.

The hubby and I caught a showing of Zombieland last night. I've been chomping at the bit for this one since I saw the trailer online. and FINALLY we managed to get out and see it. I have to admit, this one is now in my top ten best zombie movies list.

A quick sum up: The movie follows a young man who goes by the nickname of Columbus. He explains to us his rules of staying alive. On his travels he meets up with the awesomely bad ass and wacky Tallahassee, the sexy and smart Wichita, and her scrappy little sister Little Rock. The team make their way across country to get to their destination, Pacific Playland in an attempt to recapture a time before the zombie Apocalypse. Great chases, an amazing cameo, and the search for Twinkies ensue.
As usual, there is SO much more to this movie than in my sum up.

The movie plays more as a character study film. The focus is mostly on Columbus, his growth as a character, and how he starts to open himself up to the other wacky people he is thrown together with. The real meat of the movie is the relationships these four start to build together. Its hilarious of course but Zombieland really surprised me with its depth, which made the comedy funnier and scares, scarier.
I've been noticing that many people compare Zombieland to Shaun of The Dead. I'm not sure why because other than the whole zombie factor, they are two completely different films. Shaun of the Dead has more in common with Romero films like Night of, Dawn of, and Land of. Its nihilistic in its comedy, has more of a beginning middle end sense of story, and of course, slow zombies. In that sense, Zombieland is closer related to 28 Days Later. It has a very optimistic message and the story concentrates more on the journey than the destination, and of course, zombies sprint like jack rabbits! This doesn't make it superior or worse than Shaun of the Dead but it certainly makes it different and it definitely stand on its own two legs.

Woody Harrelson stole the movie for me. He took what probably could have been an obnoxious scenery chewing character and played it straight. He gave Tallahassee a wonderful underlined humanity that would surface on occasion and even got me teary eyed at one point. This in turn made me love his bat shit crazy moments of zombie slaughter even more. I also want to give props to Abigail Breslin as Little Rock who never went into cute little kid or sassy tween actor territory in her performance. She was fantastic as a smart and resourceful twelve year old who was quickly aging beyond her years.

Zombieland has also one of the all time BEST cameos in a movie ever since Tom Cruise in Tropic Thunder. Seriously....I am so not giving this away because the cameo is so out of left field for this movie yet it seems to work so wonderfully with the style of script. If the rest of Zombieland was crappy, it would have been worth it just for that cameo. But luckily it was a great film all the way around.

So my recommendation? DEFINITELY see this one. Its one of those great horror comedies that even non horror/zombie fans can really enjoy and is even more enjoyable if you are a fan. I am planning on buying this one on bluray as soon as its out!

Creepy Kitch's Halloween SAW Contest!!

Alright Bitches!
Enough of Stac and I sitting around feeling sorry for ourselves because we don't post as often as we should which is entirely our own fault!

Its Halloween!

Time to post some fucking Halloween Stuff!

I just had an espresso and a BRILLIANT idea!

What better way to celebrate Halloween than with an attempt to get GOODIES from us! Well mostly from me because Stac really has NO clue I was going to post this. But I'm sure Stac will have fun judging this.
Right Stac?
RIGHT?!
*crickets*
Shit.

OKAY! Anways!!
Here's Creepy Kitch's first OFFICIAL contest!
I say first official contest because we did at two points have other contests. One was quickly won before we really went into it and the other no one really entered. Not that I blame them because the prize sucked ass for that second contest. And depending on your POV this prize might suck ass too but its a prize I'm willing to shell MONEY out for!

So here we go!

Creepy Kitch's First Ever Awesome Halloween SAW contest!

You mission, should you chose to accept it: Write up your own original SAW trap! It can be funny, scary, serious, what have you. But it can't be from the movies. Send your entries to edengarg (at) hotmail . com.

Guidelines: Nothing racist or homophobic or involving rape...we're sensitive flowers. Gore? Completely fine. Creativity? A Must. Foul Language? FUCK YEAH!

Deadline: October 31st (This Halloween!) You have until Midnight Pacific time to send in your entry!

And of course, the kicker:

THE PRIZE!:
1st Prize - Your Choice of SAW movie on DVD. Yup, Cins here will buy you your choice of SAW movie and send it to you. Because that's the kinda gal I am! (Blue Ray and collectors editions excluded because I still have house payments.;))
2nd Prize - A piece of art work drawn by either Cins or Stac (your choice!) of a subject your choosing! (Once again though, please don't request anything Racist, Homophobic, or Rape.)
3rd Prize - A print of Cins two wacky sketches "Zombie in a Hamster Wheel" and "Jason Makes a Compost Heap" ...both which will look FAR better quality than those scans.

The winner will be announced the first weekend of November in a rain of heart shapes confetti and flowers!...or we'll just post them up on the blog.
So go forth! Send us your entries! Or tell a friend about this and have them send in their entries!

Come on Folks..Its not everyday a redhead is willing to buy a stranger a DVD!

Halloween Movie Madness! Week 6 (CAUGHT UP!) - Dead Snow

So, I DID finally get to this damn movie last night.

And I squeezed it in right before Heroes.
DVR, you're awesome.



Dead Snow was recommended to me by Mike at The Cadaver Lab Podcast. I'm a huge zombie fan and I've only heard about this from a few blogger friends. All I knew was that it had zombie Nazis in it.
And honestly that's really all I need.
I'm a simple woman, with simple needs.



So in a nutshell: Dead Snow is about a group of med student friends who decide to vacation for the winter up in a secluded cabin in the mountains. Unfortunately, the entire area is full of Nazi zombies. Why Nazis? Well apparently during WWII Nazi soldiers occupied a small town until the town's folk drove them out by force up to that mountain side. I'm not sure WHAT turned them into zombies but I'm sure it wasn't pretty. Decapitations, gore, and a sex scene in an outhouse (AAAAAAHH!!) ensue.



I'll give you fair warning, Dead Snow starts out REALLY slow. There is a lot of set up getting into the film. We have our heroes settling in, playing winter sports and Twister, chatting each other up, having sex in an outhouse (UGGH! WHY?!), and finding out about the area's horrible past before we really get to the action. I tend to not mind long set ups for movies and I do like it when a film tries to create characters that are more than just gore fodder. But I do think some of the set up could have been cut. It started to drag a bit. But luckily, just when I was considering turning it off for a while to watch Heroes, Dead Snow starts moving like a freakin' freight train and I was glued to my TV. So stick with this movie, the payoff is great!



The zombies in Dead Snow were definitely not your typical zombies, fast or slow. Our zombie Nazi team lead by a creepy and non verbal Col. Herzog were agile, emotional, and very VERY intelligent. Zombies with motor skills are a terrifying thing indeed! Also, you could take one down with more than just a head shot which did give our human characters more of an even playing field. I'm not sure if you could call them zombies or just cursed because of these traits. But they did eat human flesh/brains. Its a discussion I will have to save for my other zombie enthusiast friends for another day.



The zombie fights were stellar! We had hammers, chainsaws, machine guns, and many other epic moments. They also did a few homage shots to Evil Dead while preparing for battle. While the movie was not what I would call a zom com, it did have some really hilarious moments and some amazing "AAAH! Right in the KISSER!" battles. And a bad ass sews up his own neck with a fishing hook and some duct tape. If that isn't balls, I'm not sure what is.



For zombie fans, this movie is worth the watch, even with the slow set up. It doesn't bring anything new to the genre but it is a lot of fun. Just hang in there through the game of Twister and the outhouse sex (WHO WOULD THINK THAT WAS A GOOD IDEA?!?!) and I assure you the payoff is nice.

Okay, I am caught up! And not a moment too soon! I'll be off to Las Vegas this week. AWWW Yeah. So play nice with Stac!...or actually..Stac, play nice with everyone!