Wednesday, January 27, 2010

Monsters Vs Madmen...IS BACK!?! Round 7!

Holy Shit! I almost forgot about this!
Well I forgot then was wracking my brain for a new opponent then I saw cheesecake and well yeah...forgot.
Anyways, On with the fighting!

Alas...
Candyman, we hardly knew ye. But you DID last two rounds AND you were neck and neck with Severen there for a while! My hooked avenger, you almost made it.

So Severen made it to the next round...and I have to admit I was rooting for him simply because Bill Paxton has never been sexier, damnit!

BUT will Severen live against a new foe? One of his OWN kind!?

Round 7 Monsters vs. Madmen we have:

The frighteningly hawt Severen from Near Dark

VS

The I'm frightened I FIND him hawt, Marlow from 30 Days of Night.

Vampire vs Vampire!!


Yup. We got the devil may care violence of Severen up against the cold calculated leadership of Marlow. Okay, for ME this a close one.

Lets see them in action. Unfortunately the videos are not embeddable so click below!

And Severen...is still a dick.

Shout out your votes in the comments area and we'll tally them up and announce the winner next week.

3,2,1 - FIGHT!

Tuesday, January 26, 2010

Keepin' Ya'll in the Loop!

In case anyone is wondering what the hell is going on...

The last two posts are referring to this one right here. Stac and I decided to challenge each other to watch more movies. And for an added touch of spice, we're assigning each other a film. I figure it will probably work like this:

  • We declare a theme and toss out a film
  • Watch said film with certain things too look for (theme, Easter eggs, how to watch it)
  • We review said film on the blog
  • Hilarity ensues

If anything, this will keep us busy for a while, not to mention introduce us both to movies we have not seen. This week I beat Stac to the punch and declared it black and white week...If Stac beats me to the punch next week then she gets to call the theme.

This is all pretty much a big elaborate way for Stac and I to both post more and to fuck with each other. We will still post our random weird articles of course, but hopefully this will shake things up a bit.

Either way, I hope you enjoy!

Monday, January 25, 2010

Project Black and White: Redhead Edition

Okay! I have YOUR assignment, Cins!

Your black and white assignment is for: The Thing From Another World. This is the movie that John Carpenter remade (in a MUCH gorier version) in the early 1980's.

Your special instructions are: You MUST watch "seriously". No having friends over, etc, because the movie loses a lot of its tension. Try to watch it alone, in the dark, and then; ReVIEW, baby! I'm going to look around see if it's available to stream anywhere online. If not, it's on Netflix.

I LOVE this movie, and any more it is so overshadowed by its remake (which I also enjoy). Rumor is that Howard Hawkes actually did most of the direction. I have no idea if it's true, but the dialogue is wonderful, something Hawkes was known for. Also keep a look out for the Ghost Host and tell me where you spot him!

Let The Creepy Kitch Weekly Movie Challenge...BEGIN!!

I DECLARE THIS WEEK BLACK AND WHITE WEEK!

Stac, Listen up! Your mission, should you chose to accept it (and you should because I said so) is to watch the classic black and white film:

Carnival Of Souls
The 1962 version, not the 1998 remake.

This is one of my all time favorite creepy weird B&Ws and YOU Miss Stac are going to watch and review it this week. You can find it on Netflix but you definitely can find it on Hulu.com
...even if you have seen it before...watch it again.
MAW HAHAHAA!!! *cough cough* Umm..Ahem...yeah.

Hopefully Stac will make her own post with my movie challenge shortly.

Bring on the Carnage!!

Thursday, January 21, 2010

Bad Acting!

So its apparently Monsoon season here on the west coast. And do you know what I like to do on cold stormy days? I like to surf youtube and watch horrifically bad scenes from horror films.

Yes, whenever I am down or things feel gloomy,shitty acting always brightens my day....not that the gloomy weather is depressing me. I actually love it. I'm just looking for an excuse to watch some schlock.

AND I'm going to share it with you! WOOO!

Here are some of my favorite bad scenes from crappy horror films:


Silent Night Deadly Night 2 -Garbage Day!
We all know this one...It never ceases to baffle the hell out of me.



Troll 2 - OH MY GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOD!
Someone needs to give this kid an Oscar. Not only for his fine line delivery but also for how he doesn't even seem to realize there's a GIANT FLY on his forehead. That's real folks....Real.



Shark Attack 3 - I'm really wired..
Seriously...this WORKED? His cock must be huge.



The Wicker Man - Bear Suit Boxing.
Just...watch...seriously...This is pure awesome.



Grotesque - ACTING!!
I have no idea if this movie was a horror film. I assumed so because of the title and it has Linda Blair in it. Regardless, this clip has some of the best...and I mean THE BEST scenery chewing I have ever scene. You can see the veins popping out on the lead thug's neck. He looks like one of those squeezy stress toys every time he speaks. BEAUTIFUL!



And there it is...ENJOY!

Monday, January 18, 2010

Awesome New Blog Alert!

Life With the Undead

Fictional (duh) accounts of a man's recording of living through the zombie apocalypse! I love stuff like this! It's not very long, so it's easy to get caught up. I am going to watch this one eagerly!

Sunday, January 17, 2010

Ghost Shows

This is sort of a great time for creepy TV; on SyFy (insert eye roll here) there is a favorite of mine and Cins, Ghosthunters. Sadly, there is also Ghosthunters International which appears to be where the TAPS' less able younger siblings go so they don't bother the grownups. Seriously, they went looking for Hitler's ghost. Tacky AND over the top!

There's Monsterquest on the History Channel, and on the same channel you can always find a gamut of Haunted Hotels, Creepy Destinations, or Haunted History programs to choose from year round. (Incidentally, to the History Channel: the Lizzie Borden Bed and Breakfast is scary, I GET IT, please talk about other places!)

Aside from Ghost Hunters there is also widening selection of specifically paranormal programming to chose from. I've seen ads for Paranormal State, Haunting Evidence, Paranormal Police, Psychic Kids, and even Cartoon Network is in on the wagon with their own kid aimed paranormal investigative show. I can't remember the name of it, but it's pretty hilarious to hear pubescent boys shriek; the sound of a voice popping at a million decibels is a haunting, beautiful thing.

But the newest (to me) and my current favorite when I can find it on is Celebrity Ghost Stories on A&E. This show is interesting because of what it should have been and what it has turned out to be; when I first saw this title pop up in my guide I groaned. I was sure this was going to be some typical example of celebrity worship with the added insult of watching the fabulously spoiled get smoke blown up their asses because one time they thought they'd put on Dolce and Gabana and it had turned out to be Versace OMG how did that HAPPEN???

I was wrong, completely. The set up is very basic: two or three celebrities past or present share their experiences, and they are frequently eerie. In the episodes I've caught they've had everyone from Belinda Carlisle to Illeana Douglas. To date I think my favorite stories include Joan Rivers, who tells this story VERY straight, Kelly Carleson (who is on Nip/Tuck as a porn star, apparently? I don't know, I didn't recognize her) who has been able to see the dead since she was around twelve years old, and I think it was Jordan Ladd who essentially had the incorporeal corpse of her parents' friend drop across her bed. All of the episodes are disturbing to me, and it's that kind of quiet menace and vague, intangible threat you get when you're with a group of friends and the conversation turns, as it always does in my family, to the unsettling.

Its very good, quietly engaging, and all around I recommend it. I hope that foreign actors start to get asked to appear on the show; that would widen the pool of stories, and I'd love to hear them.

I also want to apologize for being MIA so often; I've got a wicked case of writer's block lately. Dammit.

Thursday, January 14, 2010

Movie of the Week - Grace

Yet ANOTHER movie that has been sitting on my table for months and I never picked it up to watch until now.
Warning to any pregnant women who read this blog! You may want to pass on Grace until you've given birth and the baby has stopped teething!

So in a nutshell: Grace is about a young woman named Madeline who has finally gotten pregnant after many failed attempts. Unfortunately, she is in a car accident which kills both her husband and her unborn child. Despite the dead child, Maddy still decides to carry the baby to term and miraculously, she wills the baby back to life. But there is something horribly HORRIBLY wrong with her baby girl. Suspense, insanity, and some of the most disturbing scenes of breast pumping ensue.

I assure you, the synopsis does not even give the details and subplots of this movie any justice. But I don't want to give anything away so I'm being very vague here.

At first I really wasn't' sure what to make of Grace. It sounded interesting overall but I've always been more of a fan of campy horror. The whole disturbing horror sub genre tends to get too much under my skin and I'm upset, disturbed, and depressed for days. So I was almost afraid to watch this one for a while. Well I've decided that I'm kind of an idiot for sitting on this sucker for so long because it was definitely one I enjoyed.
What I loved so much about Grace was how extremely subtle it all was. While it did have gore and some disturbing context, it was all done in a minimalist manner. This, I believe puts less emphasis on the horror that baby Grace isn't natural and more on what lengths people would go to to protect their child. And watching Maddy's decent into madness was far more frightening than anything Grace was. To the audience, Grace just appeared to be a normal healthy baby girl. The only main clues we gets to things not being right are how she attracts flies (Beautifully shown with the tons of pest strips hanging around the crib) and that she has a very bad smell that doesn't come from her diaper. and that's all that was really needed.
The story is dominated by very strong females. But this is far from a "Girl Power!" film. Actually, every woman in this movie is pretty screwed up in the head. The director does walk that fine line between "deeply flawed characters" and "The Bitch be crazy!" with this story and manages to create some very real women that were in no way insulting to me as a female. They could have easily slipped into crazy bitch territory and have gotten campy but luckily the performances remained subtle and creepy. BIG props go out to the two main actors in this movie. Jordan Ladd as Maddy was wonderfully haunting. The obsession she has for her baby reads in her eyes from start to finish. and Gabrielle Rose as Maddy's controlling mother-in-law Vivian was flawless.

Visually the movie was impressive. The picture quality changed from brightly lit, colorful, and crystal clear in the beginnings of the film then deteriorated slowly and subtly to fuzzed edges and washed out tones as Maddy begins to lose her mind. It also contains one of the few moments of gore at the end that really startled me.

Grace is a slow burn of a movie. Its not action packed or gore filled but gives you a deep sense of dread and disturbance as the movie goes on. I truly enjoyed this movie and I feel like it should be considered a classic of the genre. So overall, it gets one of my highest recommendations.

Tuesday, January 12, 2010

Creepy Kitch Discussion Time! - Is Less More?

And its mainly discussion time because I STILL haven't had a chance to sit down and watch the two movies I need to review this week (Evil Things and Grace). But the blog looked lonely sitting all quiet like so I figured I'd keep it company.

So here's my question for the masses:
What is more scary to you; lots and lots of graphic gore or something that only suggests lots and lots of graphic gore? Now I'm not asking what is cooler and more entertaining to watch but what is more frightening.

As I've stated WAY too many times on the blog, I am a less is more type of gal. I really like it when a movie lets me imagine the horrible things rather than spoon feeding it to me. I have one Hell of an overactive imagination (which really does explain my acute sense of paranoia) and sometimes all I need is a hint, a word, a slight description, and I am off the deep end. Before I even saw it, the suggestion of what the movie Se7en was about gave me nightmares for days...then the movie gave me nightmares after I watched it simply because you never saw the kill scenes, just the aftermath.
And I will admit, just the poster for Funny Games freaks me the hell out. I haven't seen it yet and I"m not sure I could get through it. But the small blood stains on the white gloves gives me the willies BIG time.
Suggestions of gore always scare me most.

HAVING SAID THAT...
I can also say that certain moments of total gore can really freak me out as well. But it has to be something that I consider pretty realistic or "serious" for it to get to me. Campy over the top clown gore doesn't scare me. Is it cool? Oh Hells yes. But does it scare me? Nah, not really. But scenes that are wither realistic or full of complete object terror for the victim will get to me. For example the eye scene in Zombie II, the barbed wire room in Suspiria (wow, the Italians are fucked up), and ESPECIALLY a scene of the cop falling from the stair well in [REC] are all pretty gory, surprising, and terrifying to me. So gore, in a realistic manner can be pretty scary if portrayed in a specific way.

So, What are your thoughts? I'm always curious as to people's Point of View when it comes to what they find scary. Is less more in your book?

Sunday, January 10, 2010

Cool Shit Alert, Cue Up the Claxon!

Whilst link jumping, I happened across a new blog: Zombies and Toys, tying together two of my favorite things! I quickly added it to my watch list and our linkage, and hile exploring came across the latest thing I absolutely MUST have, right now: Customizable, creepy little vinyl skulls, from SkullyBoom! How AWESOME are those? The greenish ones are even glow in the dark! And since I also play with customizable, creepy little vinyl dolls, this is a marriage made in, uh, Washington!

I shall definitely add this to the must-have list! I already have ideas in mind!


But even COOLER is their other offering:

Come to Momma!

These are SPEAKERS for your iPod/ MP3 player of choice! An awesome little skull speaker, with which to play my delightfully morbid musical leanings? Yes. Yes I think so! Come paycheck, one of those darlings is MINE!

Go on over to skulyboom.com and give their offerings a look! I dunno 'bout you all, but I think I'm already in love!

Creepy Kitch's First Screener!

Yes...the blog has arrived, folks! Because Creepy Kitch was sent its first movie screener!
Well okay this really is all due to the awesomeness of Johnny from Freddy In Space who tossed my address to the film makers. But still, I feel special now. And a special feeling Cins is a happy Cins. And a happy Cins means no human sacrifices tonight in the village!

Anyways, I was sent a rather impressive looking package for the movie Evil Things. A great cover letter from the "FBI" and a spiffy looking DVD as well. I dashed over to the website www.evilthingsmovie.com and took a look at the trailer. I believe this movie may be right up my alley. It looks like a great slasher shakey cam film...and I am a HUGE sucker for a shakey cam film.
So take a look at the website and check out the trailer! I hopefully will be posting a review of this sucker this week so keep an eye out!
Until then, I'm going to bask in the idea that someone felt Creepy Kitch was important enough to send a screener to.
Pardon me, I'm off to preen.

Saturday, January 9, 2010

The Cadaver Lab

Mike and Sam, you are in TROUBLE.

TROUBLE.

TROOOOOOOOOOOUBLE!

Everyone who reads this blog (all ten of ya!) go to cadaverlab.com, sign up for the forums, and TELL MIKE AND SAM TO GET THEIR ASSES BACK TO MAKING PODCASTS!

Thursday, January 7, 2010

Review - My Name Is Bruce

Before I get started, I want to post a quick amendment to my favorites of the decade list I did last week.

How...HOW could I have left out one of my all time favorite horror films ever?! Because I was sure it came out in 1999, not 2000, that's why. Next time I need to research better. ANYWAYS:

American Psycho

This movie is one of my favorites. It walks that wonderful fine line between horror and satire and does it perfectly. I was a Christian Bale fan back in the time of Newises (Don't Judge Me!). So seeing him finally shake the little sensitive boy persona he was getting shoehorned into for a while was great....and he was half naked through most of the movie which ain't half bad either. It's frighteningly shallow and also has the BEST chainsaw chase scene ever.



Okay, now I feel better.



On with the Review!



I had, My Name Is Bruce on my Netflix instant cue for a while. The boys at Cadaver Lab mentioned it many episodes ago and I tossed it up...and promptly forgot about it. A few months and several bottles of wine later I turned the sucker on and watched it.

In a nutshell, My Name Is Bruce is about a small town called Gold Lick that is being terrorized by a Chinese spirit, (and protector of bean curd) Guan-Di. In an act of desperation, a young teenager and die hard Bruce Campbell fan hunts down said actor, clubs him over the head, and hauls him back to Gold Lick hoping Bruce can save them all. Bruce is convinced this is just a movie shoot. Hilarity (And I mean it this time) ensues.

Now I will admit that this movie will make absolutely NO sense if you're not a Bruce Campbell fan. It's pretty self referential and definitely made for his followers. So if you don't know who Bruce Campbell is or if you barely heard of him, don't bother with this movie....but since this is a horror blog I'm going to assume you all are fans of El Bruce-o. This movie is absurd. And I mean that in the most positive way possible. Bruce Campbell not only directed this movie but was also a writer on the film. Its full of a lot of in jokes for the fans as well as plays off of Bruce's most famous character persona, Ash. So Bruce portrays himself as a blustering, self centered, egomaniac in his usual charming manner. You're really not getting a movie about Bruce Campbell but a movie about the crazy persona that Bruce Campbell puts out there on the screen....which really makes me wonder what the real Bruce Campbell is really like. I'm pretty sure he doesn't live in a trailer...or drinks hooch out of a dog bowl.

The movie is low budget and when I mean low budget, I mean LOW BUDGET. The special effects are awful and scenery chewing is epic. Yet I'm positive it was all done on purpose. The amount of camp and wackiness this film unloads is fantastic from the fake blood to Ted Raimi playing multiple parts in a bad wig and moustache. It all fits in with Bruce Campbell's King of Schlock title. Not only fits in, but milks the shit out of it! It does get a little slow in parts and at times is a bit all over the place with its cheesiness. But El Bruce-o keeps you interested with his charm and chin...even when he's playing himself as a big ol' douche bag.

Its a really fun film overall. If you're in the mood for a silly movie and lots of Bruce love this is worth the rental. But if you're not a fan, best to skip this one.

Tuesday, January 5, 2010

Corpse Boogie

This is a really awesome animated piece set to Danse Macabre by Saint Saens, one of my favorite pieces of creepy classical music-- it's impossible to hear that piece and not want to waltz.

Give it a looksee; that is one charismatic, violin-playing, tricorn-wearing skeleton.


Monday, January 4, 2010

Happy New Year- A Challenge to the Creepy Kitch Girls? Perhaps?

The new year is upon us! More creepy shit awaits! And Stac has proved to us that she is indeed alive and NOT held up in a bunker wearing a ski mask and torturing men for money.
...or IS she?

Anyways, I figured I'd toss out this friendly challenge to my partner in crime, Stac...which I hope she will take...if for anything for comedy's sake. In an attempt to keep us short attention spanned ladies going on the blog front I've decided to do a horror film a week to review on the blog. This is mostly because I realized how many dang movies I've missed lately. And I'm hoping that maybe, JUST maybe Stac will be willing to join me on this.

I also want to put a proposal out to Stac...which I will probably regret as soon as I say it....I think we should pick out each other's films.

So Stac...you up to this?

Or will these be our faces after we deside this is a good idea?

Also, dear awesome readers from the interwebs, do you have any films you'd recommend to us? I'm looking for some good ones so lay 'em on me!

Also, after a little more discussion time, Stac and I may or may not have some interesting and exciting news about the future of this blog. It all depends on if we are slackers or not in 2010.


Happy New Year, All!

Sunday, January 3, 2010

Holiday Recap and One Creepy Question

I am a bad blogger. Absolutely rotten. I had almost a month off, and what did I do? Absolutely nothing, that's what, and it was GLORIOUS. Actually, that's not true; I reread Peter Straub's Ghost Story, one of the best books of the supernatural ever written, in my humble opinion, and played My Sims on my DS.

I also, for the first time ever, drank in the new year, and got my first piercing since my earlobes. Getting my ears pierced was my fifth birthday present, so for Christmas this year one of my nieces paid to get my conch pierced! I felt pretty fuckin' hardcore, I must confess. Nothing scarier than a 32 year old with delusions, huh?

Now for the creepy question! When I was very small I caught part of a program that my parents watched pretty regularly, I think. This I assume was the Halloween episode, and there was someone murdering patients at a hospital. At one point a nurse was giving a suspicious patient something in a prescription bottle; it was revealed to be jelly beans (that right there would have been proof of guilt in my opinion-- this was years before Jelly Belly, and all other forms of jelly beans are terrible). At some point the good guys go to consult some psychic woman who, for some damn reason, used a puppet as her medium of communication. This whole scene was SO UPSETTING. The puppet looks in recollection like a mash up of Madam and Miss Piggy.


+

=


?

?

?

?

?

?!
At some point during the questioning the puppet thing flips OUT and its eyes start to glow and the lights go out. Eventually the killer is caught after trying to kill someone by strapping their arms down and putting an air bubble in the patient's IV drip.

Does this ring a bell with anyone? I'd really like to put a name to this horror, and watch it again, so any help you can give me with the my brain worms would be most appreciated! Tell us any answers you have, or just about how your holiday was, if so inclined!