Tuesday, May 26, 2009

Monsters Vs Madmen- Round 3!

I'm Back! I'm dehydrated and hung over...this is a sign that I had a good time.
Considering the amount of spirited beverages I consumed I would like to point out to Stac that I am NOT a slacker...you light weight.

ANYWAYS.

You bitches are ruthless! I mean it!
When you have you're hearts set on someone there is no holding you back is there?
In other words...

Gage is Dead

I really thought he would stand a chance too but he only received one vote. Poor evil little munchkin. So after two completely flawless victories, Samara is retiring to her corner to rest, recover, and attempt to work on her wood burning hobby.
That was a shitty attempt at a joke. I won't deny that.
Samara will return later for more fights

Moving on from creepy nightmare children, this next round we put up the two old farts of horror.

Everyone's favorite vomit monster
Kane from Poltergeist 2

VS

The mortician on a mission
The Tall Man from Phantasm


For me, this is a very hard choice. Both of these men scare the gravy out of me. On one hand we have a scary old bastard who has the hordes of the undead on his side, on the other...well..almost the same thing but in a completely different scenario.
Either way, both of these fellas gave me nightmares at one point in my life.

Lets see them in action.

Here's Kane giving himself a creepy intro to the family. He doesn't do much but honestly, does he have to?



And here's the Tall Man. Lets face it, we all at one point feared seeing that over our bed.


On a sort of but not really related note. I knew a gentleman who looked exactly like the Tall Man. His name was Aubrey and he was probably the kindest, most soft spoken, gentle soul I ever met in my life. But for the first month meeting him I was terrified to talk to him and feared I'd see him in my full length mirror at night.


Which old surly bastard will reign? Which will have to haul out the BenGay after his ass whoopin' ?!

The winner will be announced next week!

3-2-1 FIGHT!

8 comments:

Stac said...

Tall Man, hands down. He will totally turn Kane and minions into vicious Jawas and then put their brains into sphere. And then he'll say "BOOOOOOOOOOOY."

TALL MAAAAAN!

Stac said...

Light weight?!!

.. yeah, that's about right.

Slacker.

Johnny said...

Nooooo! R.I.P Gage!!

Did you know that the dude who played Kane was dying from cancer when he filmed the role? Thus why he's so frail and creepy. That makes him ever scarier doesnt it?

But i'm gonna have to go with the Tall Man.

Stac said...

Johnny: If I remember correctly, he was also married to the actress who played Mamah in the first Addams Family Movie.

Nojh said...

Hmm. Never seen either movie myself, so I'm going based off the clips.

Kane definitely has the creepy thing going, and seems to have some sort of mind control powers both when hes talking to you, and when you're lightly cleaning up your house. He also seems to be able to make it rain while its sunny in places other than Texas.

Tall Man seems to be able to float above your bed and direct minions to molest you (and I assume kill you) in your bed at night, loves the smell of broken down cars, and is REALLY FREAKIN TALL, and has a kinda "lurch" from the Addams family feel to him. Like he could punch you through a wall if he could just lift his hand.

Ya know what? I think I'm gana go with Kane. He strikes me as the smart kind monster. Tall Man could go all physical on him by before that'd even happen, Kane have an entire neighborhood on his side, going all holy war on Tall Man I bet. Plus if Tall Man ever actually stopped to listen to Kane talk, or did some light dusting, he'd be screwed! He could try that flying trick but I'm guessing Kane would just make it rain, and we all know how hard it is to fly in the rain.

So final vote: Kane

Cins said...

Stac>>You only WISH you were a slacker like me. I'm the only Stressed out slacker in the U.S! That makes me a super slacker that gets shit done!
...light weight.

Johnny>>I remember hearing about that on a documentary about the film. Makes it TWICE as creepy too. Heard he wwas just a sweety though.

A Cinematic Slice of Cheese said...

Kane was creepy but did not scare me. Plus I just have to go get a midget and a Native American to fight him off.

The tall man is an unstoppable force of evil that supplied me with millions of nightmares growing up.

My vote? The Tall Man

hannahrae said...

Hands down, Kane. That guy just gave me the creeps, but the Tall Man, not so much. Maybe I just need to give the movie another watch, but it didn't scare me...at all.