Saturday, July 25, 2009

Was there an alternative title for this?

Nightmare on Elm Street Part 2....Freddy's House Angry Penetration.

Seriously have you SEEN THIS MOVIE?! Some people were saying that you only see the gay metaphors when you're really looking for them. Perhaps I am looking really hard for them.
But when a gym teacher is pelted with countless amounts of balls as his naked supple butt cheeks are whipped with a wet towel by Mr Kruger before his body is penetrated by his claws, I start a wonderin'. This is after they pointlessly film the gym teacher's visit to a leather bar. WHAT WAS THE POINT OF THAT?!?!
They weren't even GOOD metaphors! What are they trying to say? "Hey, pal, if you come out of the closet, you'll become Freddy Kruger" WHAT?! WHAT THE HELL, MAN!
I have so many questions!
Why did the bird explode?!
Why does Freddy hate anything from Ikea?!
Why does our leading woman look like Meryl Streep?!
Why did our leading man have a box in his closet that was marked PROBE?!
Did I finally find a movie that pissed me off more than Jeepers Creepers and Exorcist: The Begining?!
WHY WHY WHY!
POR QUE!!!

....I'm okay.
Thanks Stac.
I'm so getting you back for this.

11 comments:

niebuck said...

Wow this was your first time experiencing the piece of shit known as A Nightmare On Elm Street 2: Freddy Does Elm Street?

was that the title?

Tower Farm said...

Yes, the gay "overtones" in this movie are legendary. Who knows what was going on while the script was being written?

Gotta say I like this movie. This was last time we saw Freddy as an actual villain. In Part 3, he'd suddenly become a vaudevillian-esque comedian who spouts off one-lines like the drunk uncle at a family reunion.

-Billy

Cins said...

Niebuck>>Dude, I was avoiding it for a reason! Unfortunately Stac caught me when I was liquored up enough to want to watch it. *LOL*

TowerFarm>>It was all insanely hilarious. Horrid but Hillarious.
And while I agree with you that its the last time we see Freddy as a straight villain, you didn't really see him much at all which sucked. But his Make-up was really great. I do like seeing the gooey Freddy over the more slick latexed one.
BTW, Stac and I love your blog!

Stac said...

.. I don't think Freddy was even SLIGHTLY a "straight" villain in this film..

And Cins, I regret NOTHING! MWAHAHAHAH!


EQUINOX!

niebuck said...

I think Freddy and Pinhead needs to get it over with and have the mad monkey evil villain pain and pleasure slash and gash sex.

Stac said...

Niebuck: All that would be left is a wash of red blood, some scraps of leather and felt, and a whole lot of rusted metal.

Awesome mental image!

niebuck said...

Stac....you also forgot the clean fresh scent of Brut

Stac said...

Niebuck, I think there would be a smell, all right, but it would be closer to library paste than cologne. ;)

Cins said...

I figured the smell would be closer to Popcoarn shrimp and shame.

niebuck said...

mmmm Popcorn shrimp and shame. The scent of champions

Stac said...

I am so making shrimp for dinner tonight now.

Mm. Shrimp in a heady shame sauce!